Merry

Eat, Drink and be Merry. Words to live by. And celebrate Holidays, no matter whose they are!

The Edward

Resetting the World

I noticed something very odd the other day. I was playing this game online, on a test server, when I noticed the oddness. On this test server, people were going to very dangerous places, trying out all sorts of stuff that they do not normally do within the game. I admit, I was swept up in this and tried it too. I found that a lot of what I was doing I would have considered impossible to do in the real game, though it was actual quite easy on this test server.

See, the test server is a copy of the virtual world where the game developers let people test out the latest changes to the game before the "go live" in the real game. They run these for about 2 weeks at a time, and anything that happens within this test server game has no impact on the characters one has in the real game. This is why people try stuff that they normally wouldn't, this world is reset and cleaned, while the live world remains untouched.

The odd thing was that people would try new things, because they had no fear. The question became for me, "Why did they have fear in the first place?" See, the online game only lasts as long as one pays a monthly fee. In reality, at some future point, the "real" game will be gone as well, and yet people play very conservatively there. There is no reason to, since neither of them are real - people should be pushing their characters to the limits all the time, since there really is no downside. And yet most don't.

This applies to our world as well. This world will reset at some point, either as a whole or for each person one at a time. And yet do people live like that? Most do not. Most live like this current snapshot will be the way things are forever. Advancing slowly, careful not to step too far in case of Consequences. And yet in the long run, the only consequence is that one didn't get to explore the whole world because they were too conservative.

My advice - don't assume that what you have is a stable point. Reach for things. Try risky things that have a good chance of failure or bad consequences. If you succeed, you will be much further ahead! And if you fail, you will have had fun, and you can always try again before the reset when it all gets wiped anyway.

The Edward

Ugly 17

I heard the news the other day - shocking news! Bernie Ward, a long time liberal talks how host, "was indicted by a grand jury on three federal counts of Internet child pornography" according to wikipedia. I was shocked, as stated in the first sentence. I didn't agree with many of his opinions, but I still listened to him at nights sometimes. Now I have to burn my ears.

See, because even listening to someone who is alleged to have possibly possessed child porn should be just as much of a crime as possibly having owned it. Now, by having listened to him on occasion, I am no better than a catholic.

I still find it so hard to believe. I mean we all know that "anyone" under the age of 18 is just pure vile ugliness, and to think that anyone could possibly consider such a being attractive in any way is just perverted beyond the beliefs of hardworking Americans. I mean, until that magical transformation happens on a person's 18 birthday, the day that they become a real person, they are just not worth even looking out less the retching begin again. Yuck.

And to think that sex, that inherently disgusting evil act foisted upon us by the Lord of Darkness Himself, Satan, was possibly also used in some of these alleged images that he owned... wow, shocking. That perversion that we all shun because of its shear vileness that we call sex, to use that on a vile creature and to take a picture of it... they should lock those people away for a few lifetimes. But the worst of them are those people who freely download such filth without giving any money or encouragement in anyway to the people who created these monstrosities, and to possibly use these images for their own pleasure... Imagine that, people getting pleasure from an image rather than a thought, and to get pleasure from something that we object to... and because we know without a picture these thoughts would never have happened - these image seekers' immortal souls could have been saved. Oh the humanity!

I know I stand in good company, the company of people who have never once looked at someone who hasn't see this planet go around the sun at least 18 times and thought, "wow, that person might possibly be attractive." So I am glad that we have a police and court system willing to spend our hard earned tax dollars ridding us of these types of people, people who have done nothing but bring wakes of pain in their passing. And host highly rated talk shows for a few decades or played for The Who. Bastards.

The Edward

A Tip for the Working

Just stop it - and here is why:

I have some liberal friends (as well as some conservative friends, though I am neither - a friend that is) but this is about those liberal ones. Well, a specific subset of them, not all of my liberal friends are this way, though it is funny to think all liberals are this way. I was enjoying a meal with these friends at a local restaurant where the service and food were amazing. Everyone agree, spectacular.

Over the course of the meal, I was hearing stories about the homeless people and people without enough money to pay their bills, etc. They were telling stories of how they gave tons of money to help these people. It was a good cause, they were telling me. The people who were getting this money were out of work and had real needs. I have heard all of this before, and agree with some of it. Overall, a fine lunch with interesting conversation.

Then the bill came.

It was around $25-$30 per person. Well, one person's was actually $24.50, not $25 and he argued that he shouldn't have to pay more than what he owed, so he wanted to throw in $24. The shocking part for those who haven't been following along was that he had just been talking about giving tons of money to the people without jobs. Now, here was a person who had just done a great job for him, bringing him some great food, etc. Now, giving this person an extra 50 cents was a deal breaker. (any overage goes directly to the server)

This is a trend I have noticed over the years, and I do not like its impact on me. Because if I throw in some extra to help out these working people, then the total bill always seems to be correct, which means some people didn't throw in enough. And since the total is correct, it is a hard argument to make that some people really should be throwing in more just to cover their meal. So, I try to be as exact as possible until the bill is settled.

So there are two points here. 1) If you are a working stiff, those liberal people don't care that much about you. Somehow by actually doing something to contribute to society makes you less of a person. Remember that when you vote. 2) If you make at least 2x over your server, and most people I know probably make at least 10x over, and you think that person did a good job, the best way you can help out society is to help out those people directly. Don't wait for the government to help them. An extra buck a day per person can make a difference in these working people's lives.

Be a big tipper, there is no downside.

The Edward

I Like Pie

If you are here reading this, which I guess you have to be in order to be reading this sentence, and had been wondering, "Gosh, what profoundly exciting thing will The Edward regal me with after six weeks off. I bet his first new topic will be mind-blowing! I can not help but wonder what it be, in a forward tense kind of way!", well here you go: I Like Pie.

You are probably thinking, "Wow, what a let down. That's it?! Where is that keen sight into what makes our world such an abomination in the eyes of The Arcane World? Where is the funny? What a minute, this is The Edward we are talking about... maybe he means this in the more rude sense, as in he likes hair pie? That's got to be it!"

Sure, I'll admit that I do enjoy hair pie, though without so much hair, but that is not what I meant. Thank you for trying - your thoughts on this were much more clever than was I was thinking of. My thoughts were much more simple: I Like Pie.

I have an Apple Pie in my refrigerator right now. I have only ever bought a few pies in my life - mostly as gifts or to bring to friends' houses. But this past weekend, I bought a pie to share with some friends, and I realized something: some people like pie. I had just never considered it. It is kind of like in one blog entry from a long time ago about music in restaurants. I suffer through music there and always thought others must as well, until I realized that others must like music or restaurants wouldn't spend the money on having it just to annoy customers. Same with pie.

I always thought of pie as something one buys as a gift or to share, but not something that one could say "I like that" about. It just was. So, the next day, after the group of friends had left the building (they actually left the shortly after the pie, but this part of the tale happens the next day), I decided to try a piece of that pie in the silent solitude of my house, and to have no preconceived notions of pie. And I must say, it was a darn tasty pie. That is when I realized, I Like Pie.

The Edward

There be demons

Isn't a demon a being that is in hell and exists to promote your suffering? Wouldn't stopping you from enjoying yourself while in hell be part of that suffering? What if they had cars in hell, wouldn't demons surround your car with their cars and prevent you from driving? What if there were jobs in hell, wouldn't demons be your boss and your coworkers, never giving you a promotion or a break? In this hell, these demons could torture you by creating desires within you for certain things, then be able to take an active part in denying you access to those desires?

If all of these things are true, isn't this hell and humans are really demons?

The Edward

You don't want that!

I remember back to my college days, we would sometimes sit around and ask questions. You know, talk. I think they all found it boring without a drink in hand, but I thought it was a fascinating look into the minds of humans. Some of the questions and answers I will share with you in hopes that it will illuminate my point.

1) If you could go back in time, when, where, and why? An answer that few of the guys gave was: go back to when Winona Ryder wasn't famous and fuck her. I think that started a chain of guys naming other women that they would also want to do this to.

2) If you could have one supper power, what would you have and why? Common answers were invisibility or mind control. Again, so that they could meet up with some current celebrity and fuck her.

After just these two, I think we can see a theme, but is it the theme you think you are thinking of?

I believe I only ever met one person who said "I would want the power to make certain women fall in love with me." See, in the previous two answers, there was no talk of what the other person wanted. Isn't a definition of rape having sex with someone who doesn't want to? No one else talked about consent. They didn't want the other person to fall in love with them, have feelings, etc, they just wanted sex with that person. Isn't that the same thing as rape? They wanted to have sex with that person's body, not with that person, so she really didn't factor into it.

It looks like I am on the side of the guy who wanted women to fall in love with him, right? Wrong, and I will explain with another example. In answer to questions #1, some people also said "Go back in time and buy lots of stock XXX". What are they really saying? The money that they make off of this purchase would have been someone else's, right? Isn't this stealing? Going back in time and stealing from people who made money when you didn't? So that falling in love guy still wanted her to be someone else - like if he slipped her a drug that made her go wild for him, wouldn't that be the same thing, and wouldn't that also be rape? Taking something that someone else has but isn't giving it to you right now?

The common thread over all of these things is that people really do not want what they thing they want. If one thinks of the consequences and implications, it isn't what they believe it to be. One can not change one thing and keep the rest. If you want a woman (or man) sexually, you really want to rape them. If you want to have made a lot of money from someone but didn't, you really want to steal their money.

This is why I do not want things or people.

The Edward

What are you saying?

I was driving around just a few minutes ago, rocking out to my latest favorite song, Benzin by Rammstein, when I realized something - the volume on my stereo was way too loud and the iTunes audio compression sucks. It just sounds like crap - the bass was pumped too high, and yet it sounded tinny. Beside all of the audio artifacts that were trying to suck the joy out of the listening experience, I thought of something! They were speaking German.

Look around and find someone who is really enjoying some music. How will you know that they enjoying it? They will move their bodies in a rhythmic manner. We can probably agree that when one hears a song that they really enjoy, it is hard to not move ones body to it. So there is a link between what sounds we hear and some kind of physical reactions. Music can make some people cry, laugh, feel empower, etc. So, obviously there is also an emotional aspect as well. But, wherein lies the connection?

I had always assumed that it was the music itself that had these impacts on humans. Then again, I was biased because I can not understand words when sung, so I always discounted the words themselves. In an impassioned speech, the words can motivate people both physically and mentally, so maybe I was wrong. Or maybe there was something else?

I think we would agree on all things up to this point. What I liked about the Benzin song, besides that it was released on a very important day in my life, is that this song would probably suck in any other language than German. German has certain sound characteristics, just like every language does. Operas tend to be in Italian because their words tend to end in sounds that can be stretched (oooooooooo, etc).

The connection between all of this: are some languages better at motivating people? Are certain languages better at just getting to the core of a human being? Not because of the words contained within the language itself, but because of the sounds that are used to make up the language. Just like certain musical sounds can cause certain feelings. And certain accents can cause someone to melt.

Does a guttural language create more warlike people? Ever heard Klingon? Sure, it is a made up language (or so they tell us...), but the people who made it chose those sounds, and it definitely has that feel to it. If Klingon was sing-songy, do you think it would really be the language of a warlike people?

Are people slaves to their native tongue? Is there a language of peace and calm? Could we invent a language that uses sounds that allow focus and concentration - one that could be used for the sciences? In what ways could we change the world if we just changed how we pronounce words?

The Edward

Dexter's Dilemma

That's right, I'm kicking off the new month talking about a TV show. Well, I had to wait until the latest season started before I talked about that ending of the past season.

To catch up - Dexter is a show on Showtime, based on a series of novels. The main character is a serial killer, with a heart of gold. He claims he feels nothing, which is what makes him a killer, though throughout the season, he sure does seem to react as if he had feelings. Anyway, he only kills people that deserve it - other serial killers. He works in the police department and knows how to cover his tracks. No one knows about the real Dexter, except his dead father in flashbacks.

At the end of the past season, we find out that a serial killer that has been playing games of cat and mouse with Dexter throughout the whole season is really his long lost brother, who also feels nothing. He tries to convince Dexter to kill his adopted sister and join forces with him. His brother claims that no one else knows the real him, and that if he told his sister what he was, she would not take it well.

I enjoy the show, but the actual logic contained within the shows world really makes no sense. Dexter's brother makes an invalid point and the monologue from Dexter states that he believes it totally. Sure, he could have someone who knows his dark side (which he thinks is his only side), but his sister knows another part of him. The claim that his good side is fake is unjustified. If he goes with his brother, he would lose a side of himself, something his brother would never understand. Yet, this part of the argument is never really addressed.

What is the point of all of this? Well, if you pretend to be someone else, part of you is that someone else. All things that you do come from some part of you. You have a dark side, a side no one knows about. You take actions to cover it up, hoping no one will see the real you. And there is also a part of you that you want people to see, but no one does and it is frustrating sometimes. You are living a lie...

Actually, you are not. That face which you show is one of your many faces. All of them are real. Remember that next time you think you are acting!

The Edward

Illegal Wiretapping

It is in the news these days... again. Why, I remember back in the day, there was no such thing as illegal wiretapping. All of the cool kids were doing it. Tapping their wires every chance they got. Sometimes even tapping the wires of friends - from what I hear; not something that interested me, but to each his/her own.

I remember when I first heard of the NSA. Most people didn't believe that such an organization existed. There were rumours, but nothing concrete for many years... many years of denial of its existence. Now it is common knowledge. Or, I guess by the latest news stories, it probably still isn't common knowledge, but at least it is not in denial.

The NSA had the authority to tap the wires of American Citizens. Was there hue and outcry over this? Not that I remember. Yet now a days, days when everyone puts every piece of person information about themselves on public forums like blogger, myspace, youtube, facebook, etc, people are up in arms that someone might find out something about them! Horrors! Like this is all new to them.

First off, if you have no net presence, then you probably aren't reading this blog, so we can dispense with that. But, if someone you know has no net presence, then they might be able to justify saying that they live a private life rather than a public one. Everyone else, it has always been there, and it will always be there. And stop posting everything about yourself if you do not want people to know anything about you! "Really, someone other than my closest friends is reading my sex blog? Wow... I feel so violated!"

Back in the day, when there was the NSA tapping wires, what happened? Did people lose anything? Were secrets revealed? Did people find out about your affairs because of these taps? Well, it is true that back then, they had the ability to tap the phone lines of only 10% of the population. Still, that is a lot of tapping. It is/was all done at the central phone company offices, no need to put a bug in your phone like in the movies. So, there is a chance that someone has been listening to your phone calls for all of your life... and here is why.

10%. If you were in charge and could listen in on 10% of all of the phone calls, who would you pick? Would you pick people who do nothing but watch TV? How many times would you want to have on record that the latest episode of Friends or Mork and Mindy was killer? Probably none. So, whose wires would you tap?

Probably suspected terrorists. Known criminals. World leaders. Congressmen. That isn't really that large of a percentage, so you still have 5% left. I would guess that one would tap the top 5% of the country. Top business men. Top scientist. High IQ people. These are the people who, if gotten involved in the wrong things could lead to rather large disasters. Give secrets to foreign governments, etc.

Are you in the top 5% of the IQ range? I'd guess you are. I'd also guess that your wires have been tapped your whole life.

The Edward

PS There was an old joke from years ago. If you ever discovered a way to factor large numbers (the basis for all computer security), there was no need to call anyone. Just pick up the phone, get a dial tone, and talk. Someone will visit you shortly.

Faith

A lack of faith causes people not to turn inward, but outward.  They look at others and say that they are an abomination to god and must be smote or converted or whatever.  Yet, if it is a faith in god that we are talking about, it should be obvious that god created the heathens too.  If he was unhappy with their actions, he could probably doing something about it, without your help.  One who has doubt in his faith wants to wipe out those who do not share his/her faith, because if all of the unbelievers were gone, then only one faith would be left alive and there would be no more questions.  That is what these people believe, but it is a false belief.

Wiping out or converting someone is not an act of god, but an act of man trying to justify his/her faith to himself/herself and others.

If you get two people together and ask them what they believe, they will be shown to have different beliefs - even if they believe in the same faith.  There will always be minor variations.  All of these religious beliefs would have to come from some source, someone else told them what to think/believe.  If they all independently came to the same faith with no human influence, then their might be something to this god thing, but that is a different story, since it has never happened.

So, once we get two people who have listened to the same human and claim to have the same belief in god, they will not actually share all beliefs.  And further more, over time they will drift.  They will add to their belief when they encounter new things in the world.  We can see this now.  Which holy book talks about god's view on computers?  Cars?  Space travel?  Yet people need beliefs about this things.  So within each religion, those things not explicitly mentioned in their holy books, each person will have come up with what they believe their god wants them to think about these things.  And they will be different, since they didn't come from one source.  Does this mean you would have to kill or convert them to the holy use of computers as per your beliefs?  If someone used the wrong kind of mouse, is it an insult to god and those people need a good smiting?

So, what is faith?  It is your own thoughts.  It is something that you believe.  It can be something that you think other people believe and/or other people should believe.  Some people spend their time trying to convert others over to their own beliefs.  Some people try to wipe unbelievers off the face of the earth.  Either way, they both have something in common:  it is an outward sign that they do not really believe what they think they should believe, and they hope that they will increase their faith through these external means.  Given a chance to think about it, they really should just abandon their faith, or turn inward to confirm that they are living the life that god wants of them.  For the only being who they have to make it right with is their god.  And their god will make it right with everyone else, without their intervention.  Unless their god is too small to speak for himself.

So, what are your actions saying about your god?  And your faith?  For everyone has a god and everyone has a faith.

The Edward

No Secrets

I hear it all the time and see it in the movies - someone has a secret! And once someone discovers that secret, one can be blackmailed into doing evil nasty things that they wouldn't normally otherwise do. And yet, all of this is a lie, since there is no such thing as a secret.

Say you are cheating on your spouse. You probably do not want your spouse to know, hence the word cheating. If you had his/her permission, then it would just be good old fashion sex with someone else. So, with this cheating going on, you think you have a secret. If someone found out and threatened to tell your spouse unless you gave them money, sexual favors, or something else, you might comply in order to keep your secret.

Before all of this, the person with whom you were cheating with knows you were having sex. The person who found out obviously knows as well. Other people along the way probably know as well - probably quite a lot of people actually. Where is the secret? Ah, the secret is that some group of people are in the dark about this piece of knowledge. A secret implies a person or group of people for whom you want control over certain knowledge, not the population at large.

So, what you really have here is that you do not want some people to know something. If the rest of the world knew about your "secret", it wouldn't matter, as long as it wasn't any of the people you want to control the flow of this information to.

I try to have no secrets - ie nothing that people can blackmail me for. Sure, I try to control the flow of information around me, since that is a big part of manipulating people and of life. But if someone finds out, no problem, since I assume that if they were interested in knowing they will eventually find out, and as I said, probably many other people already know.

Like this blog. You are reading it. And yet there are many people close to me who do not know about it. Am I keeping it a secret? By the standard definition, yes. But you can plainly see that I am not, since it is here in a public forum where anyone can find it if they looked. No real secret, even though it might appear that way to those left in the dark.

Not all information is for everyone, but does that make it a secret?

The Edward

Close Call

I have been living in fear that past few weeks. Fear! It is a quaint little city in California, kind of nice actually. No, that's not true, it was something else...

See, since I left the "working world", I have become kind of a shut-in. The kind of shut-in that goes out to movies and dinners and hangs out with friends, but still, a shut-in. Because of this, I am blissfully unaware of the news, and that is how I missed the story that lead to my fear!

Britney Spears with no pants! She decided to go out for a walk in only boots and a t-shirt. From what I read, no underwear either. Now sure, I am all for chicks not wearing underwear. And no pants is kind of a bonus. So actually, I have no problem with this news story, just that I didn't know about it when it happened. :(

The others news story that I missed out on - a place that I ate was the epicenter for a breakout of a contagious disease! 4,000 people probably affected! And I was there when it happened! I can not stress enough - WASH YOUR HANDS WHEN YOU FINISH USING THE BATHROOM. If she had done this, there wouldn't have been an epidemic. Really. That's all it took.

When my credit card bill arrived the other day, I saw that the date of my eating there was the day after all of this went down. I thought I was there the day of. Whew. Though, I had little to worry about, since I wash my hands enough for the both of us... and probably a few other people too.

All of this lead to my reading up on a dreaded disease, so I will not have to worry about it any more. Let me share a little with you.

Most people do not know this, but hypothermia is a contagious and deadly disease. If someone you are near catches it, chances are that you will catch it to. Avoid people suffering from these warning signs:

Slowing of pace, drowsiness, fatigue
Stumbling
Thickness of Speech
Amnesia
Irrationality, poor judgment
Hallucinations
Loss of perceptual contact with environment
Blueness of skin
Dilation of pupils
Decreased heart and respiration
Stupor
Death

I hope that by me sharing this with you, you too can avoid the close call that I had with a dreadful human disease.

The Edward

Pre-Burnt

I heard something interesting the other day... though I am not sure it is was a few days or a few weeks ago. Obsession really distorts ones sense of time...

Humans have lived in fear of fire for a long time. There were many great fires in memory. Half of Chicago burned, London burned, The White House burned, etc. But have you noticed that we do not hear of these kinds of things any more? I never really thought about until I heard this: "We do not live in fear of fires because we live in pre-burnt structures"!

We burn out anything that might burn from bricks, steel, glass, etc. If all of the materials out of which we build no longer have anything left that can be burnt, there is no stored "fire energy", hence no fires. Interesting, no?

This got me to thinking about the current love of my life - food. We Humans cook our food, and by doing so are removing some of the energy from that food. The foods we cook have less energy to stoke our inner fires, so to speak. So maybe the Japanese are on to something with this Sushi thing...!

This leads to a personal note from me - I love burnt food. I love burnt cheese especially. Grilled meats are amazing because they are burnt on the outside. Yum! If other people think it is burnt to a crisp - beyond eatable, I'm there cooking it a bit longer for my tastes.

So, does this mean that by my love of burnt foods that I am depriving myself of the energy content of the foods that I eat? How about you - how do you want your steak cooked now?

The Edward

Hellsing

I just found this DVD series called Hellsing.  Then found it was based on a Graphic Novel, so I am in the process of reading them.  Very interesting tales of vampires!  Or more precisely, there is one main vampire, Alucard, and his half vampire slave, Police Girl.  There is a lot more to the story, but the master vampire is obviously what drives the fan base.

So, why are Vampires cool?  They are always portrayed as monsters who kill more people than the most prolific series killer, and yet have an air of aristocracy about them.  Alucard kills other vampires because he thinks that they are not true vampires, that they lack that sense of propriety.

I believe in the original mythos, vampires weren't cool.  They were the undead, so they reeked of death - ie had a funky smell.  More like brutal killers rather than the anti-heroes of today.  When did all of this change?  And why?

The other thing I found interesting was Police Girl, other than the fact that they draw her as always wearing very short skirts.  They seem to often have someone like this, someone who became a vampire willingly, but doesn't want to embrace the vampiric ways.  In this story, she avoids drinking blood, even though it causes her many problems.  Same thing happened in that Anne Rice novel as well.  Is this supposed to represent the last vestiges of the main vampire's humanity?  Is this to show that they aren't all bad, that at first they resist drinking blood and taking human life, and even though they eventually give in, they still probably have that resistance?  Are we trying to humanize our monsters?

What makes mass murder into entertainment?  The Showtime show Dexter is about a serial killer, and it is devastatingly popular.  Would it be popular with someone who survived this kind of tragedy?  Do we as a people take pleasure in other's suffering?  Are these shows and books a way to secretly rejoice in it, knowing that we are not alone, that others out there must feel as we do?

Are all of these signs that we just live in constant fear of ourselves - our true feelings, and of others and what we think they are capable of?

The Edward

More on Spoilers

After my Harry Potter spoilers, I was talking with a good friend about it.  My contention was that there is no such thing as a spoiler, the idea that was espoused by my blog entry.  He pointed out something that I hadn't considered - people want to feel the effect of the master story teller as she weaves her spell with words to convey the sense of wonderment when that which a spoiler so crassly spoils, is revealed to full effect.  I was captivated by this idea.  People just wanted to be taken on a journey by the story teller.  Spoilers would ruin that, since the shock/effect would be diminished with knowledge of what would happen at some point in the story.  Wow, how did I miss that!

After pondering this for a few days, I decided that though it was a good idea, and was  lulled by its logic, it didn't ift my blog.  See, there is no such that as a spoiler!  That's right, I am going to spit in the face of logic!  Though, I will now explain why.

Let's say that there is a book coming out soon and I tell you that the main character dies in the end.  Now what?  You can choose to believe me or not.  Before I said that the character dies, if you had spent any time at all waiting for this book, you probably thought that it the main character might die.  So, what have my words changed for you?

Let's say that I show you a picture of the page that clearly states the main character dies.  How does this change anything?  I could easily have faked this.  And this actual did happen with the Harry Potter novel - there were fake pages out there claiming to be "spoilers".

Unless you didn't think anything at all about the future and what might happen in the book, anything I say or show you, you probably already thought about.  Does this mean that you have already spoiled the story for yourself by thinking?  Do my words and/or pictures carry more weight than your thoughts?

Before I saw The Sixth Sense, I read a review that spoiled the movie.  While watching it, I saw the movie differently than if I knew nothing about it going in.  The movie kind of sucked.  Why?  Because it totally depended on the surprise factor.  I know how many of the Shakespeare plays end, yet I will still watch them.  Why?  They should be "spoiled" for me, based on the logic of spoilers.

It is all about letting go.  When I see a movie, I analyze it death.  I always know who did it near the beginning of the movie, which means most dramatic movies suck for me.  I think most people could know who did it, but they fool themselves - they purposely do not think about the possible "spoilers".  The people who didn't want to know how the last Harry Potter book ended probably didn't think about how it might end.  Any thought about it might have spoiled it for themselves.  Letting go and not thinking about any aspect of the story is the only way to let the story teller move you to the place they are trying to get you to.

So, if you want to enjoy a good story, enjoy a play about which you already know the whole story, or to watch/read a Mystery, don't think.  If you think, you will spoil a good journey.

The Edward

PS Actually, I'm sure I would have figured out the secret of The Sixth Sense and would have found the movie to be just as annoying. It doesn't matter to me if I figure it out or if someone told me before the movie begins - knowing what will happen just makes watching it play out very tedious for me.

Fuzzy Bunny Slippers

After seeing the latest Harry Potter movie, I thought of something.  "Wow, what a crappy movie" would be the obvious thought, but not this time (well, not the only thought this time).  They have characters that call themselves Death Eaters.  Beside the fact that most people eat dead things, it got me thinking.  They all had these cool black cloaks and cool scary face masks and dark foreboding names, but why?

I've seen this in countless movies and books.  The Dark Side.  Starscream.  Joe Black.  The Master.  Kaos.  Why do all of these groups/people have dark sounding names?  Is it easier to recruit people into your organization with them?  Like in Reservoir Dogs - no one wants to be Mr. Pink.  Why do people want these tough sounding names?  Do they lack a true belief in their own internal Evil, so they need someone external to themselves to recognize this with words that connote their evil nature?  Sounds like someone needs a hug and a little confidence building...  wimps.

When I become an Evil Overlord, things will be different - I want people confident in their Evil.  I think the names and outfits, to be truly evil, should be lies.  Calling someone or something not what it is, ie deception, sounds more interesting to me.  The leaders should have names like Snuffles, Huggy, and Smiles.  They will great each other with the word "Friend" instead of comrade or saluting.  And the standard outfit would be bright colors and soft materials.  I think these things would inspire more fear in people than any of this Dark Lord crap.  "Run!  He was friendly and wears interesting colors!  He is a member of Friends of Life!  The slaughter is about to begin!"

It is true, I have actually seen things like this in some movies and books.  In horror films, there is nothing scarier than a child demon.  Sweet little innocence is actually a code word for death and destruction.  And there are the gentlemen killers in some of these stories, people so confident in themselves that they have a seductive aura of Evil about them.  People of quiet confidence do not need names like Death Eaters to inspire terror - like in The Devil's Advocate.  I guess that is why they say "it is the quiet ones you have to watch out for", for they truly know Evil.

The Edward

Harry Potter Spoilers!

This seems to be the topic on the lips of every news outlet - how will the final Harry Potter book end?  What will happen to all of those lovable characters?  I'll tell you something, there are no spoilers.  But first, a warning:  The rest of this blog MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS, if there is such a thing.  You have been warned.

I first saw an article on cnn a week or so ago that someone had hacked the computer at the publishing house and was posting spoilers from what he read.  He said that Hermione dies trying to save Ron.  And Snape dies.  I was so shocked to read this that I canceled my pre-order of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows!

Then a few days ago, someone posted a set of pictures of the final seven pages of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows!  This made all of the media outlets again!  And more shocking, he had a different summary of the book:  Ron dies.  Hermione becomes a nurse.  Ginny marries someone else.  Percy dies.  Snape dies.  Shocking!

Then yesterday, while searching for that link again, I saw another round of stories, this time about someone who posted the entire book online in the form of blurry pictures.  Someone read it and had these spoilers:  Hedwig dies.  Fred dies.  Ron and Hermione get married.  Harry and Ginny get married and have three kids.  Snape dies.  Amazing!

What do all of these spoilers have in common?  They are all wrong!  Sure, they all claim Snape dies, but that just shows what I am talking about.  All of these latest Harry Potter books are under lock and key, being kept safe, just in case their secret escapes.  But, my question is:  what is their secret?  And what happens if it escapes?  Okay, my two questions are...

The books are nothing more than what J.K. Rowling believes would happen to the characters in the world she described in her previous books.  It does say what happens, only her opinion of what happens.  I'm sure you could think of a much better ending to these characters than she could.  I am sure you have already thought of an ending that you would like to see.  Why?  Because this ending is the one that is best for you.  Why do you care what ending someone end came up with?

The characters are in your mind.  The ones in her mind are different than the ones in your mind.  They may share the same names, but obviously if you have envisioned a different ending than she did, they must have a different life in your head.  Why destroy your characters and replace them with hers?

That is one of the reasons people are avoiding spoilers.  At some point in the near future, people will know how J.K. Rowling ended her characters.  But people want the characters in their minds to live a little bit long.  To enjoy what they believe should be the conclusion.  J.K. Rowling will kill your characters this Saturday, so why read her next book?

The secret to building a nuclear device, if escaped, would be the same as if you invented it yourself.  if you compared those leaked secrets to what you invented, you would have the same works at the end.  That is a secret.  If the ending of Harry Potter escapes, it will not be the same as the one you invited yourself, as shown by the above spoilers.  This is not a secret.  It is just one person's ideas. There are no such things as spoilers, ever. Sorry to ruin the ending for you.

The Edward

Entropy and Order meet in a bar...

Listening to the Joy of Science on CD again, and there was talk of Entropy and how it increases.  The "latest" thinking is that the amount of order must be taken into account for a process.  The example used was a deck of cards just out of the box has a higher order than a shuffled deck.  And no matter how much one shuffles the deck, there is almost no chance that it will end up ordered again, hence Entropy increases.  But there is a problem with this.

Each state is just a state - there is no bias.  A deck of cards just out of the pack is in no better order than a shuffled deck.  Shuffling a deck of cards doesn't increase the entropy, it puts it in another unique state.  It is only the human mind that sees a deck out of the box as "in order."  Are the cards sorted by atomic thickness?  Number of atoms of carbon?  Number of photons bouncing off of them?  Even if one chooses that the face of card be used to determine order, which order?  What if the order I want is all cards of like type be together?  So, instead of by suit, it is by value?  In that case the cards coming out of the box are not sorted.  At each and every shuffle, the cards are sorted by some criteria, and shuffling them again will make it so that they will never exist in that order again.  Each order is unique, it is just that we have such limited rules on what is ordered.

If we can define Order with one rule, we consider it ordered:  all suits together.  The Universe does care about our definition of Order, and so us creating a set of rules for how the Universe acts based on what we label Entropy seems very silly.

The Edward

A Fight Half Done

I noticed something the other day, but that is a topic for a different blog post.  Today is about something I've seen in horror movies for awhile.  Not the naked women that used to fill these movies in the 80s and 90s, but instead lets talk about the final scene.  The monster, this overwhelming creature of pure evil with the strength to back it up, gets shot and falls down.  At this point, the pitiful human has an advantage over the monster, so the human is now the more powerful of the two.  So, what does this human do?  He or she throws down the weapon, turns his or her back and walks away, followed by everyone in the audience screaming at the screen "He isn't dead yet!  Shoot him again!"  They never do.  Once the human has the upper hand, they walk away.  Then the monster rises up and attacks again, followed by a struggle of some sort, and the human finally kills the monster, which is what he or she should have done in the first place. This person had to wait until the monster was once again a stronger threat before he or she could kill it.

Two quotes come to mind when I see this in a horror movie:  "Never get involved in a fight unless you are willing to finish it." and "Never deal a non-fatal blow to an opponent."

Who amongst us wasn't picked on in school?  This picking on probably didn't create a sense of "wow, I learned my place! I will accept my lot in life..."  How many of us instead thought, and still think to this day, "I'll show them!  Some day I will be rich and/or powerful, and will come back to this town and show them who's boss!"  See, the same thing as in the monster movie.  Not finishing someone off when one has the upper hand is always fatal!

At every point in a conflict one side is the stronger of the two.  People fear beating on the wimp, because it is a losing proposition.  One needs to deliver a decisive blow early in the fight, or do not even bother.  Who wants to kill someone or thing when it is on its last breath?  Do you want to see an hour of someone kicking someones ass, beating them to a bloody pulp, then finally killing them?  After an hour of this would you say "Wow, that was so cool!  That tough guy finally won!"  Probably not.  But if the tough guy went through a crowd of wimps, killing them all with the slightest touch, I imagine it would a very popular movie!

This is all based on people not wanting to kill the underdog.  At some point in the fight, if the underdog has the upperhand, he is no longer the underdog, so the roles are reversed.

When invading another country, it is the same thing.  If you do not take over and master it ASAP, it is like kicking the ass of a wimp for an hour.  No one wants to see it.  No one feels a sense of empowerment.  People are just disgusted by it.  If you want to be an invader, go in and kick ass!  Do not leave a fight half done, or that country will hold a grudge forever.

The Edward

Quantum Space?

What's all this hoo-ha that I've been hearing these days?  Quantum this and quantum that.  Seems that the young whippersnappers have gotten together with the old geezers and decided to start a ruckus.  Making everything quantum on us while our backs were turned.  Outrageous, I tells ya!

I remember the days of my misspent youth, everything was continuous back then.  Then one day, some wiseguy decides that energy is discrete, then suddenly every starts talking about quantum theory, with quantum energy.  I should have known then where this would lead, but I was young and foolish.  Nipped it in the bud, I should've!

This will lead to the downfall of the human race, I'm sure of it.  Mark my words, the aliens that discover the ashes of this once proud race will point to quantum theory and laugh, and laugh, and laugh.  Or whatever those methane beathers do that is the equivalent of mocking anothers hubris.

See, after quantum energy, these slick willies calling themselves Scientist decided that maybe everything is quantum!  Maybe time happens in discrete units - there would be a smallest time unit, for which there is no smaller.  Then the granddaddy of problems:  quantum space!  Space, with a smallest possible unit!  Quantum of space.  Can you imagine that?  Scientist actually proposed such an idea!...

What does this mean for us?  It means that everything that we know is wrong!  The shortest distance between two points can no longer be a straight line, if space really exists with a discrete unit.  How do they explain a^2 + b^2 = c^2?  There can be no non-rational distance with a quantum of space, so therefore going from point a to b is the same as moving along one axis of a, then the second axis, etc, until one reaches b.  Short cutting a diagonal has no meaning!  I tell you, if a is at 0,0, and b at 1,1, the outrageous claim is that the distance is now 2, instead of the sqrt(2).  One over then one up.  Blasphemous I tell you!

And all of this is based on Quantum Theory. A theory that at its core contains a divide by zero. Why as any nimrod knows, one can prove anything with a divivde by zero! Renormalization, my ass! Pure balderdash! Poppycock!

Who is watching over these Scientist?  I thought it was your turn?

The Edward

Riding My Ass

It was to be 100 degrees here where I live for the 4th of July, and I thought that just would be hot enough, so I went to Vegas where it was a record 116 degrees.  Better yet, flying would have gotten me there way to fast, so I decided to spend 9 hours in my car, each way, to get there with 113 degrees outside for 8.5 hours of it.  During my 18-ish hours in my car on the road, I learned a few things about driving from my fellow drivers.

1)  If there is no way for someone to pass, drive as slow as possible.  There are a few places along the way where there is only a single lane, with a 60 mph speed limit.  The person in front of me will deem that to be way to fast for any reasonable human to travel, so he will be sure to keep it way under 50 mph.  At some point, the road becomes two lanes, and it is like heaven opens up before me!  Suddenly, Mr. "Anything Above 50 is an Abomination in God's Eyes" can't go fast enough.  60 will suddenly be way to slow, which leads to #2.

2)  If you want someone in front of you to speed up, pretend like you are going to pass him.  So, one is in the fast lane, going fast, when one comes upon someone going much slower.  What will this person in front do?  Well, if there is a car next to him, rule #1 applies, he will match the other cars speed so that one can not pass him.  If there is no one next to him, or the car to the right suddenly blows up, in either case leaving a lane free in which to pass, one has a chance to make this person speed up:  simply go into the other lane.  Once over there, the slowpoke will find a new religion, a religion of speed.  Suddenly, that easy pass will become a difficult pass as he is now going more than 10 mph over the speed limit.

3)  If someone is trapped behind one of these moving roadblocks, ride their ass.  If someone is trapped, why not make their situation worse by riding as close to their rear bumper as possible?  All of the cools kids are doing it!  And it must get you to you destination faster... if your destination is an afterlife.  This one seems very dangerous, so I am currently unsure why drivers want to do this, but this one seemed to be very common.  Ass being ridden is a very frustrating situation to be in!

4)  If someone is riding your ass and you have a free lane next to you, pulling into it to let them pass is a mistake.  This is a mistake I make all of the time.  I figure the person riding my ass really wants to pass me, so I pull in the slower lane first chance I get.  The person suddenly seems to lose interest in passing me once he is around my rear quarter panel.  So, I can no longer easily get back into the fast lane and I have some moron in my blind spot.  Try to be helpful, and people screw with you.  I guess that is why people tend not to move to the side to let people pass, because of they do not want to be on the receiving end of this rule.

So, what have we learned today?  Nothing really.  I'm sure everyone has experienced these things happening to them before.  It was just kind of overwhelming to see it happening throughout the entire 18-ish hours, over and over again.  Sure, I had experienced this before at my last job, which made me hate what should have been a trivial drive into work, but after 18-ish hours I have to ask, what is wrong with people?  Doesn't everyone just want to get to their destination as efficiently and safely as possible?  I'd have to say not...  Humans...

The Edward

PS  After learning rule #4, I had the ass rider pull up next to me so he and his girlfriend could point and laugh at me for the next few miles.  So, be sure to learn all of these rules so as to get the best experience on your next cross country trip.

Happy!

Happy 13th anniversary! As of today, it has been 13 months since I started this little blog. Hard to believe that much time has passed. Hard to believe I still write... though recent times have been tougher to put pen to paper. I have such a back log of blog posts! I still write and still have ideas daily, I just find it hard to finish them. Kind of like emails - too much attachment to the results.

But not today! No context in this blog entry. I'm just a typing away randomly. No thought. No emotion. No me. I feel like a ghost, like the words are just appearing on my little screen as I read them. What will the next sentence be like? Let's find out, together!

The Edward

Buffy's Hell

Something I never thought about during my life, until I saw that Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode.  See, she was trapped in what her friends thought was a hell, so they rescued her.  The problem was that she was in a paradise.  So much for the spoilers, the interesting part to me was that she thought she was in hell when she came back to this world.  Why?  Because compared to paradise, this would be hell, right?

This was something I never thought about when I was a christian.  If what they say is true, and Heaven is a paradise beyond belief, then by the Buffy analogy, this would seem like Hell in comparison.  So, for all their talk of Eternal peace and happiness, what they are really saying is that we are in hell right now, suffering for some unknown reason.  This would be true of anyone who believes in an afterlife paradise.

This is why I believe that most religious people, those who believe in a paradise after this world, are lying to themselves.  If they truly believe that they could be in a paradise, what could possibly be keeping them from it?  If they truly believed what they preach, they wouldn't be here.  Look at the leaders of any religion, how many of them are willing to go to paradise ASAP?  None.  Yet they seem very willing to tell people to do things that will aid them on their way.  Their actions speak volumes that their followers seem not to hear.

The Edward

Garth Marenghi's Darkplace

Seen it? Funny stuff! I'm watching episode #1 on SciFi right now and can not stop laughing...

The Edward

Check Please

I've realized something recently... I've realized that I had slipped into a life that was similar to those I used to mock. I used to believe people around me weren't alive. Well, not really living - by this I mean not living life to the fullest. It seemed like people didn't remember past events so well. It seemed like they had certain things that they wanted to do, but no reasons why they wanted to do them. It was like they were given a list of things to accomplish in life, and they were just looking to put check marks next to them, so they could move on to the next item. I used to abhor this kind of life, and yet there it was, slowly becoming a part of mine!

I found that I wasn't remembering as many details of events as I used to. I used to treat each event as if it were special, no matter what it was or how many times I had done it in the past. If I am not enjoying something, why do it? Or better stated, if I have to do it, why not enjoy it? Enjoyment is a choice! Even if the task isn't. An the more special something is, the clearer the memory is, so why not make everything seem special?

What I saw in my life was that I was looking for these check marks without realizing it. I felt bad because I was missing certain check marks - no girlfriend, no children, no steady employment, not my ideal weight, etc. And with other items on my Grand List, I was just happy that I had done something about them. I should have been happy while doing it, not happy because it was over. An example of this: DVDs. I had a stack of DVDs to watch, so I powered my way through them. Why? So that I could say that I had watched them. But, did I really watch them if I didn't enjoy them? Isn't enjoying something the real measure of whether something was accomplished or not?

So, I say on to you, be careful! Do not fall for the subtle trap of trying to get things done. Something completed isn't worth it if you didn't enjoy it, no matter what it is you have to do.

The Edward

Hell?

It seems that most religions have a very simple view of hell, or at least the ones that have a view of hell. If The Real World is really timeless and there is such a thing as eternity, so much more could be done with a Hell!

Imagine that you spend your life, struggling, but you feel that you are gaining Karma through this process. You are reborn a million times, and you become more enlightened each time. At some point, you know true peace and enlightenment. Imagine how much more your suffering would be if it turned out that this whole Karma and Enlightenment was just part of Hell! Being Enlightened and knowing all of the goodness that could have been yours, you will truly suffer for Eternity!

If there is a Hell, I do not think it would be the "bringing pain to nerve endings" type. Sure, a lake of fire seems like it would suck, and it probably would. But there is more to Life than just using nerve endings for pain or pleasure. To think of an afterlife totally based on nerve endings seems kind of juvenile.

Back to that Karma thing. Based on the ideas expressed above, it seems that this would indeed possibly be Hell right now. We do not Know God's presence, we can not feel his/her eternal love, so by definition, we are separated from God, therefore in Hell. So, working oneself up to a higher state, suffering for the common good, becoming a better "person", and possibly being reborn again and again to gain that special Karma just means that you are working your way to Eternal Damnation and Suffering as quickly as you can!

Put some brakes on it. Live a little. Do not trying to advance your Enlightenment, for you are only dooming yourself!

The Edward

Is this Heaven?

Say you were to die. Say also that the Christians were correct, and when you die you will either go to Heaven or Hell for all Eternity. Eternity is a long, long time. Given all of this, let's think about what this means...

Say that you end up in Heaven. You are shocked, because you don't believe that you lead the Christan life, but here you are, in Christian Heaven. (or better still, you were a Christian, did all of the Christian things, and now you are exactly where you thought you should be!) You are experiencing all of the greatest joys (non-sexual) that you can imagine. You are perfectly happy and content. You experience True Bless every waking moment that you are in Heaven. Heaven is so magnificent that my words pale in comparison to its greatness!

This goes on for a million years or more, which is less than a blink of the eye to Eternity.

Say you wake up in Heaven one day, after these millions of years have past, and Satan is there next to your glorious bed. He tells you that you have actually been in Hell for all of this time and now your suffering can begin. Now that you have had a million years of True Peace, your suffering will seem so much worse - you will know what you are missing while you are suffering in Hell. This is far worse than just starting your suffering as soon as you arrived, according to Him.

So, the question is: Could you ever really know that you were in Heaven?

The Edward

RIP

The purpose of life.  It is something I have spent many, many hours/weeks/years thinking about, and I believe I have finally discovered it!  You're probably thinking, pussy, that is what he is always on about.  You think I am going to say that all of society is based around breeding competition, since it is.  But this is not just about societal goals, but about a bigger question, Life!

People want to be comfortable.  People work to achieve a level of comfort that they are happy with.  People could always work harder and get more money or more status in society, but most people stop at some point.  They reach a place where they are as comfortable as they are willing to go vs the pain of going further.  People want to reach this stable point, the point where they can rest in peace.

A neighbor of my parents.  She lives off a pension.  It isn't much, but it is enough to supply all of her needs, so she is done.  She has found level.  Now what?  She will stay there until she dies.  She has no forward drive, no need to get more out of life.  Why?  She has achieved her life's purpose, to find a place where she is comfortable. Forever.

I have friends who play video games.  Some spend most every waking moment doing that.  Some may say it is an obsession, but I disagree - they have reached that stable point.  Once people hit this point where their lives are arranged just so and require no more maintenance, they stop living.  They have achieved life's purpose.  Once you have gotten there, and you have a stable life, do you really need to continue to be there, or is it so stable that it can exist independent of you?

See, that is life's purpose: to die.  I consider stable things to be dead things.  People seem to want to reach that stable point, then rest.  But what is that rest but a prelude to the eternal rest of that endless night.  I do not believe that is in the cards for me, I do not believe in finding that stable point, and by this I know I will be around forever.  Ever changing, never stable, never achieving that peace that is the pursuit of the living. That one thing that all people seem to crave.

The Edward

Those are people who died, died

Man alive, I used to love that song. It so encapsulated life. But what brought this on, you might ask? Go ahead, ask!

Charles Nelson Reilly passed away on Friday. I was a big fan of his works when I was a child. While reading about him, I saw that Tom Poston passed away as well. I admit, the name sounded familiar, but it wasn't until I went to imdb.com and saw his picture that it all came flooding back to me - he was on like everything! A good guy, but no Charles Nelson Reilly was he!

Back to Charles. He was right up there with Paul Lynde and Johnathan Harris as people who influenced my life when I was young. Sure, there were others that I was a fan of: Don Knotts and Bob Crane come to mind, but they were just good actors. The Big 3 - they were different!

As a kid, I saw all that was on TV, that was all I did was watch TV (kind of why I hate it now). And all of it was kind of bland, except for Sid and Marty Krofft shows. But as actors go, they were different. Flamboyant. They lived life large and weren't afraid of being different. Later people told me they weren't flamboyant, but rather gay. Whether they wanted to have sex with women or men, how does that change flamboyance? I consider them separate things.

I love the flamboyant lifestyle - which I define as anything over the top - leather, vinyl, bright colors, chains, etc. And they were over the top, in their own way. But now they are all gone, we are are left with people like Brittney, Lindsey, and Paris - shallow comparisons to really living large. Who will be around to inspire the next generation, to tell people that it is okay to be different, to tell people that bright colors are okay for all to wear? Who?

But for all people who are dead, I have the same feeling. Death only affects the living. Enjoy the people you treasure while they are alive. Once they are gone, move on to other people who are living. Let the dead have their peace.

The Edward

The End of the Human Race!

Listen, friends, I have seen the coming of the end. The end of all that you know. The end of the human race. And I am here to tell you about it, not so that you can prevent it - you can't - but so that you can revel in it. How did it come to pass that I saw the end? Well, let me tell you a story, and like all good stories, it begins in the local sex shop.

See, I go to the local sex shops with friends, though only my good friends. I've even bought women friends items from there, good women friends. And being good friends, they tell me tales about the wonderful items they have gotten from there. I know which dildos are best and why. I know that there are dildos out there that are so amazingly good - there are claims that they are better at generating better orgasms in women than man are! See, begin a man, they do not carry items of this nature for people like me - male. All of the great an wonderful things are for women - which is why I like to hear about them in great detail. And it is through these wonderful descriptions by these dear friends that I saw seeds of man's downfall. My research has paid off!

Want to know what I found out? Well, the obvious thing, I even stated it above: they do not make devices that produce orgasms in men to anywhere near the same extent as they do for women. Why is that? Why is it that women are left to suffer at the hands of the modern plastics industry while men are left to suffer at the hands of... women. And that was it. Men can not get anything that supplies anywhere near as good of an orgasm as from real, live pussy.

I have heard tell of a fish that feels so much like the human vagina that it is actually illegal to catch. Why is that? Because someone else figured it out as well: if there was something that felt as good as real live pussy, men would fuck that rather than a real human women.

People like sex. As I have said before, it seems that this world is swimming in it - and it has to be. But it also seems that people do not like other people. Humans have this flaw, they want to have sex, but there is the trade off of having to be around other people to have it. They have solved the problem for women, and yet they still have sex with men. But, if there were ever a device invented that felt as good as real live pussy, everyone knows that that is all men would do all day long.

So, how does this spell the end of the human race? Only in this way: if such a virtual pussy is invented or found and is as cheap to make as dildos, all within one generation, all of the humans around would die out due to lack of real sex. If it takes more than a generation to get one of these into the hands of every man worldwide, there is a small chance people, probably women, would be able to put an end to this device before the race dies off.

How can we stop this? How can we make sure that this virtual pussy never comes to pass? Short of the destruction of all of science, you can't - it will happen very soon. Well, maybe, just maybe if men can find what they seek and it is easier get than it will be to slap down $50 as the local sex shop for a virtual pussy... so, yeah, there is no hope for the human race.

The Edward

I'm here already

People seem to want to stand in the exact same spot that I am standing. If I am in a movie theatre, it seems I must pick the ideal seat, based on the crowds. Walking down the hallway at work, someone always tries to walk where I am. Looking for a snack, someone leaning against the door. Going to the grocery store late at night, the only other person in the store will be where I want to go, and if I go to some other aisle, within a minute they will want to look at exactly the same think I am pretending to look at, but they want to do it from exactly where I am standing.

Enough already! I know that this is all a simulation. And I know that I am a real person trapped in it. And I am guessing that some of the others here are real as well. And some of them want to be around me, to observe what I am observing, to stand in my shoes, etc. Like I am a celebraty in the outside world, kind of like in The Truman Show. By the way, that movie was a dead give away - you told me everything!

The Edward

Biology and the Bible

I hear certain types of arguments a lot, even outside of my head between people in the real world. And I've discovered something - Biology is like the Bible when it comes to some arguments.

For example, take sex. No really, take some, I have plenty to share, just be sure to share yours as well. When people talk about sex, I hear this argument "Men want to spread their seed around. Women want to be selective about who's seed they take. It is a biological drive based on child rearing! That is why men always want sex and women do not, biology. No changing that, that is just how we are programmed. Live with it." And yet we are omnivores, as one can tell by that very same biology. (We have two types of teeth, we can digest both plant and vegetable matter, etc.) And yet there are vegetarians out there, I know, I have met a few. These are people who for have forsaken their biology for religious or social needs.

There are many examples of this, where people can choose whether to listen to biology or some societal signal. And yet in each case, even though they are deciding which to pick, when it comes to biology I hear "That's just the way it is, biological." Biology is used to justify why they do or don't do something, rather than saying, "This is what I have chosen to do."

I used to hear the same thing all of the time with the Bible. "Well, God said that we should all tithe, so give up your 10% to the Church. God said fornication is wrong, so stop that. Etc." Yet, the Bible also talks about stoning people for what we do not even consider crimes now, etc. So, the Bible was used not as a literal device, no matter how many people I have met who claim it is one, but as a justification of why they do or don't do something.

So, when I hear people say "biologically speaking" I think "Wow, that is interesting that we have a base level program to do that. And even more interesting that we can choose not to."

The Edward

Good-bye Cruel...

World? Pussy? Job? That's it, job! Now I remember. I had this spiffy new job which I was going on about. Well, it is gone now. Gone in the way of the dodo bird. Gone in the way of the bald eagle. Well, it probably is gone more of the way of a cheese burger - it is still there it is just be processed by a different internal organ now. That is with me being the mouth, the cheese burger being the job, or wait am I the hand... or was it the spleen that is now doing the burger now... anyway, you get the picture.

I was quite clear the other day when I said that women in my mind won, right? You know, the OCD woman I was trying not to become, so I took this job in hopes of avoiding my fate, etc? Anyway, I didn't overcome my fate - it was like a constant panic attack while I was there. I didn't adapt....

But that leads me to here! I can not believe I had forgotten who I was! I was trapped in a life I didn't create. Wait, I guess I did create it... well, I was trapped in this other life that wasn't me. I spent all of my days in pain. The funny thing about being in constant pain, at some point you forgot what it was like without that pain. Even for the first few days after the quittening I thought my world was over. In a way it was, the life I had, the one where I was constantly trying to forget that I was in pain, that one, it is over now. I've laughed for real for the first time in a long, long while.

So, how does all of this relate to this blog and its central theme? It doesn't, so screw you. Actually, it does. It is easy to get trapped in other people's view of the world. And it is easy to not realize it. Didn't you have a dream once rather than a scheme? Do you know who you are? Where does the line between you and your world being and end? How much of the time do you spend fighting to change your world, when change is the easiest thing in the world to do? It is much, much harder and more draining to remember the fake you, the one you present to the world, and to make sure that this fake you is consistent. That is how you know it isn't really you - you are flawed, so if you have a consistent face, it is a mask.

Do something different! Do not live the life you of yesterday decided on! Be who you are! I see you hiding there... I have lived your life for the past few years to better understand you, now it is time that you try it my way...

The Edward

I Lost

The woman in the pasta shop in my mind won.

The Edward

Sex on the First Date

When you meet a guy and he asks you out for coffee, you know he is asking you to have sex with him. No matter what, if a guy is being friendly, he is probably thinking that he might have sex with you at some point. You probably already know this and might even be thinking that you are using this to your advantage, but you really aren't and I'll tell you why in a minute. But for now let me say, if you take him up on his coffee then you should have sex. Every date should have sex as part of it. I can already hear the murmur of the crowds...

Most men expect that they are going to have sex on every date and yet women do not, why? It is the artificial value that has been placed on women not having sex. We even have terms like "she is pure", or "she is innocent". What does sex have to do with purity or innocents? Sex is biological drive that people enjoy fulfilling together, like eating or breathing. Do we look at others and say "Look at that guy, wanting to breath all of the time. What, does he have to breath everywhere he goes? Give it a rest already! Try thinking with your head and not your lungs, pal."

If you are single, you should be having as much sex as possible with everyone that you go out with, even if it is just a "simple date." The value you place on sex keeps you from enjoying it. You feel like you are giving up something and that they guy is getting something from you. Can anyone really enjoy anything if one thinks someone is getting something from oneself? I know for me, even if someone shortchanges me a penny, I think, "Wow, this sucks. That person just got the better of me, since they got something from me that I value - money." Then again, hold on to money too long and it devalues, so I should be spending it every chance I get - depreciation wears away all assets. The value of an asset comes from its use, for all things will perish in the end.

Most women seem to think that their pussy is made of gold and will retain its value no matter what the economy, while I believe it is closer to Aluminium. Even though the value of the metal underneath may go down, if you are skilled with Aluminium and a novice with gold, you will be create works of art with Aluminium that everyone will desire, or have a pile of gold that will gather dust locked away. It is not the value of the metal that should matter, it is the value in how you have learned to handle it through many, many uses. So, enjoy it every chance you get, on every date you have or with any willing friend, then you will be actually be using that willing person to your advantage by what you learn about how to use that pussy of yours to make a MasterPiece.

The Edward

Spiffy Hat

Why that is a spiffy new hat that you have there my friend? Where did you get such a marvelous hat? Hat And Tie Emporium? Indeed! No, I myself do not wear hats, but thank you for offering. No, I didn't mean to offend you, I just though that you had a nice hat and I thought I would say so. I didn't mean to imply that I wanted one as well. Back off man, will you just drop it already? Wait, what are you doing? Hats don't belong up in there? Stay away from me with that thing. Ow, quit it. I warned you. Oh why, oh why didn't you listen. How can I hide the body? Maybe I can stuff it into this hat. I think this episode will leave me scarred for life against hats.

Why hello there Miss. That is quite a nice pair of panties you have there...

The Edward

Whirl Peas

I'm not quite sure why this is such a hot topic. I hear people talking about it all of the time. I've tried visualizing them, but gosh darn it, peas are god's most disgusting creatures and a quick trip through the blender doesn't enhance their appeal. Listening to political debates is like seeing a bad episode of Iron Chef. "We want whirl peas over here, but you keep standing in our way. You want whirl peas, but are you willing to kill people for it? It will be world peas our way or not at all!" Can't these people all just get along! They all just need a big group hug! Or a big group orgy, since sex seems to bond friendships better than most anything else on this planet, even better than food. I mean who among us hasn't slept with a good friend just to make the friendship stronger? It obviously works for dating. "I kind of liked you Marsha. I think we might have hit it off, but I am not sure. But if we have sex, maybe this will turn out to be a great date after all! Just a little sex, that's all we need. Just let me slip it in for a minute." Then after the hours of sex have ended, a simple hanging out has turned into a relationship. And now these two are bonded.

So, what I am I saying? I think we need to get all of the world leaders doing it. It will be like the chimps, they will all feel attached to one another afterwards - all pair bonded and stuff. They will each have a knowing smile when they talk to each other. They would pick fleas off of each other. Who would be able to fight over peas after such a positive, uplifting, and morally correct session of good old fashion mating. Ook ook.

The Edward

Aluminium Hat

What is worth saving? Say you had some treasure, some great and vast treasure! But you want to save it for a rainy day or for your wedding night. So you hide this treasure away, won't let anyone see it, won't let anyone touch it, or lay a single finger on this great treasure. The days turn into years, the years into decades, and you keep this valuable treasure away from your fellow man. Surely this treasure that was once so valuable years ago when you were young has increased in value many fold! Everyone was so hot and bothered to get their hands on it way back then, now they must be killing themselves to just get a peek at it.

Years ago, there was this valuable metal. It was shiny and very, very hard to come by. Some smart people figured a way to get small amounts of this precious metal together. Rich people made things out of this metal. I hear they even made some crowns out of it. A bar of it was even on display next to the French Crown Jewels. Everyone want this new metal! Now a days, it would be hard to give it away. Its value has decreased now that we know how to turn bauxite into Aluminium. Something so precious in its time that it was sought by kings, and now I throw away stacks of it every day after I drink my Cola from it.

This stories are obviously related. People value some things, not realizing that there could be an endless supply of it coming down the pike. Why save it? Why not get the most out of it while you are young?! Enjoy the gifts you have, for the longer you keep them hidden away from the probing hands of others, the less valuable they become and the less you will enjoy their possessions.

I guess what I am really saying is have sex. What you have isn't really that important or special in the grand scheme of things. And if you don't use it while you can, you will realize your mistake too late to enjoy it. It is always sad to me when I meet an older woman who held on to her chastity (or something close to chastity), hoping to give this great gift to that one special person. After a while, they realized that even if they met that one person, he would value their gift less than they would. For these women they have waited so long that it becomes harder and harder to give it up - "if I have waited this long, why give it up now". They will continue to wait, or give up hope, knowing that what they have is so good that eventually someone will see its true value.

If you have a pussy, use it as much as you can. The world is full of it, and there is new pussy coming down the pike. Don't end up being stuck with an aluminium crown.

The Edward

The Perfect Piss

I do not know when it started, all that I know is that it has been with me for as long as I can remember. Probably OCD or something like that. At some point in my distant past, I noticed that pissing made a sound. Yeah, not a brilliant revelation, I'm sure it is one that many people have had. The OCD part came in when I thought to myself "Hmmm... there are a lot of other people in this room besides me. And I do have this thing about people knowing what I am really thinking or doing. A solution! Can I piss in such a way that it makes no sound?" Thus an obsession was born.

Seen, the bowl of a toilet has curves. Each bowl is unique in its curves. Some of the men's urinals (I can not speak for women's urinals) even have a little pocket on the sides, I guess so secret agents can hide stuff there. Out of sight, yet hiding in plain sight. I began to analyze these curves as a means to my goal. Could I vary my position, my relative distance to the bowl, my aim, or any other variables in such a way that when the fluid flows, it hits in such a way to not make a sound? This would be the perfect piss! Or better stated, each piss could be the perfect one.

It is actually quite complex, you want the intersect of two curves to have a smooth differential. No sound is created when particles move from start to finish with no abrupt changes in at least the first derivative. It requires a smooth aim, constant adjustments for variables like wind speed, how long between bathrooms breaks, slight shifts in gravity, etc.

Then is is also the water line - is it a friend or foe? Obviously hitting the water directly would be bad. But right at the edge, the boundary between the two surfaces, it is possible to have the water absorb the impact without a sound, but it requires the skill of a master.

Sure, there is a lot more to it than this - isn't there always? I figured it out a long time ago. I'm sure some of you might have as well, though when I go to a men's room, it never sounds like it. But, I have discovered a flaw in all of this. Indeed, I am living my dream of privacy, but the dragon that haunts my world of piss: it now looks like I enter a stall, stand around for a bit, then leave. If I do not make a sound, and there are many people around, do they ask themselves: "What is he doing over there? He is making the motions, but since I hear nothing, maybe he is doing something else? Maybe he has one of those shy bladders. Ah, isn't that cute. Maybe I'll just go over there and hug him just to let him know it is alright." What they perceive as failure is actually mastery beyond their wildest dreams!

So, even if you can master the art of doing something in such a perfect way that no one else knows you are doing it, you have to add a flaw back into it or else you might seem kind of weird. Now excuse me for a minute, there is something I need to take care of.

The Edward

Brain in a Box

Yes, I know the title can be taken many, many ways. Here is one of them, with the usual long lead up.

I was out sick for the past 4 days. Fever, which always seems to cause an almost hallucinating-like state in me, stuffy, which always causes me to fear that I will choke to death on congealed snot whilst I sleep, and a host of other minor annoyances, which always makes me feel alive. During these fevered hallucinations, I had a vision. Well, more of a thought than an actual "Oh my god, I am seeing the face of my lord! And he is telling me something! 'Kill the something something humans!' Wait, no, I think he is saying, 'kill the Martians to save the humans!' I'm glad I listened a little closer the second time." Never had one of those, just kind of fevered dream where things seem crystal clear - like one is supposed to feel as one is dying.

I realized that software companies want a brain in the box. Actually, most employers want that. They want you, as you are when you are at your best. I realized while I was sick, I couldn't even write in my blog let alone write world changing software while solving the Martian invasion problem. I also saw my mental processes as a continuum, with the health of my body affecting how far up the continuum I could be. But companies, and I guess people in general, tend to think of people as a snapshot. "When we hired you, you could walk on water. Now that you have this head cold, you seem to be drowning in small puddles of water. Still, we except you to be here and produce the same level of work output, so get cracking. Take on for the team." The team always seems to be a bunch of bastards who want you to take one for them. Why doesn't the team ever take one for you? Bastards.

I admit, I am still kind of out of it. Based on the blog post I have made this evening, would you trust me to write software that would be responsible for controlling the Laser Eye Surgery machine? Any yet, every day people write software and provide vital services while they are not in top mental states. I do not have a solution to this problem, but it makes me trust stuff a lot less.

Ones intellect is dependent on the state of ones being. So, don't interview for a job when sick. Don't write mission critical code when feeling under the weather. No matter how good you are, when you make a mistake while sick, they will not remember the sick part, just the "Wow, this person who lived 10 million years ago was the cause of the downfall of the human race. How could she have made a mistake like that - just this simple switch had to be thrown. Idiots, all of them! Doesn't seem worth bringing them all back from the dead with this nifty alien technology that we posses."

You are more than a brain in the box (at least in this world, whether you are really a brain in the box in the real world is for some other posting), you are "you and your environment". Improve your environment, and you improve yourself! Even if it is something as simple as quiting your job - the one that has the crappy environment. You will soar to greater heights than you knew possible, because it wasn't possible with that crappy environment. You are more than just you!

The Edward

My Future

Continuing with the introspection, which I am sure is a real joy to read, I was reminded of something today, something that had put me into this introspective mood a year ago. I was in a local pasta shop with some friends. After we had ordered and gotten our food, this woman walked in. Okay, it wasn't this woman, since I do not have one in my hands right now, but a woman walked in. She seemed normal at first. Then she walked up to the counter to order and did so. Shocking, I know. What she did next though... she stripped off her clothes and danced to Mozart on the table. Okay, it wasn't that shocking or interesting. She took some money out of her wallet and laid it on the counter. But she didn't give it to the clerk, and the clerk did wait for it. Instead she moved up really close to the bills and started to smooth them out.

She continued to smooth them for the entire time we were there, maybe 10 minutes. Everyone in the restaurant politely looked away, since it was obvious that she had an obsession. She seemed fine when she talked and ordered, and didn't reek of low IQ, so she probably was OCD. I sat there contemplating her and her fate when I realized something. Since everyone looked away, did she know what she looked like in other people's eyes? Did she realize how bad her OCD really was? Without that feedback loop, I doubt it. People cared too much to tell her the truth and she spiraled downward.

Well, I am assuming a lot of the above. The interesting thing for me is that earlier that day, when the time of seating at this restaurant had arrived, my friends went out of their way to find the ideal seat for me. See, when I walk into a restaurant, I immediately scan the place for the ideal seat. Just something about a certain place that I like. Actually, it built up over the years. I found that strangers sitting next to me annoy me, then the people behind me started in as well. Now it is that I jump at noises from certain directions, so I need to sit in a certain seat or I get jumpy.

So, in looking at this woman, I realized that I was heading down that path, if I wasn't there already. I realized all of the things that my friends do for me to make me more at ease when in public with them. And I realized that I have some level of this OCD.

What this made me feel is sad, but not for myself, but for my friends. I have chosen to let things annoy me, I know this to be true so I am willing to live with my choices. But I realized how hard it must be to be around me. Things that they never had to think about in their lives, like which table or which seat or how many people were on an elevator or etc, they now think about when around me.

I vowed to overcome it, which is the main reason I took this spiffy new job at a place that has four people per office. It is very tough on me - I feel drained all of the time. I hope to be less of a burden to those around me, those whom I call friends.

Maybe some day, we will all walk hand in hand down to a restaurant and boldly just sit wherever we want to, no matter where it is, or how loud the people are around the table. And on that day, birds will sing! Children will laugh! And there will smiles on everyone's faces, even the happy little puppies!

The Edward

Musical Eatery

I was in Vegas last week and while having a great time there I learned quite a few interesting things about the world and the people around me that I call Humans. See, I've been going to restaurants for years - I eat out for most every meal. Something that I noticed about some places, they have live music. I always thought that everyone was like me - they found the live music annoying and were very glad when the musicians took a break from torturing the eaters. On this trip I found that this is not true.

While dinning at a place with my friends who were on the this wild trip with me, I commented on the annoyingness of the music. They said that they liked the music. I was taken aback for a few seconds while I pondered this. I look around at the other people in the restaurant and saw them in a new light. When the band finishes a song, they always clapped. I just assumed it was to be polite, kind of a "wow, they are finally finished! But, I do not want them to feel bad for forcing us to listen to them play, so I will validate them a bit with some hand slapping.", but it wasn't so! The people were probably clapping because they were enjoying the music and they wanted the band to know it. I had never considered this before...

So, with this new insight, I asked my friends at the table, and they said "Yes, the music is good. It matches the ambiance of the place. And when the band takes a break, everyone can talk again." Their statements didn't make sense to me, but it seemed to to them, so I accepted their words at face value. People can actually enjoy the music at restaurants!

I guess in retrospect, it makes sense. If customers all found it as annoying as I do, they could save themselves a lot of money on band expenses by just not having one. Since they spent the time and money having a band, it must add to the experience of the customers. Logically, it seems to make sense that most people enjoy it. I guess it was something that I never could have guessed, since it really was something that I never considered.

The Edward

A Man in Vegas

I was in Las Vegas yesterday. I had one of the strangest experiences there. I had been telling people before I went to Vegas that I was going to win $10 million. People called me crazy. I sensed doubt from them. But when I arrived in Vegas, I found that Megabucks was up past $10 million! So, played for a bit.

While I was playing, I was contemplating my victory. I asked myself, what will it be like when I win? People will ask me what I plan to do with the money, and I will tell them I was going to use it to fund my research. Or even make up something really weird, like use the money to promote the color red.

While lost in my thoughts, an old man came to my attention. He was standing next to me - too close for my comfort and so close I was surprised that I hadn't notice him approaching somehow. He spoke to me. He said "You are xx years old. What are you going to do if you win that $10 million dollars?" xx was indeed my age, so I was surprised. I usually just ignore people whom I do not know, but this was kind of odd, so I stopped playing the machine to pause to think what I was going to say to him.

I decided to just blow him off, so I smiled and said "I'm going to retire." He looked at me and said "No your not." Then he said "I guessed your age. You are not going to win. If you did win, you wouldn't quit working. You are not going to retire. You are not going to buy a boat, move to Florida, and sail for the rest of your days."

I was kind of taken aback. I was still unsure what to think of this situation. I decided to be honest, but curt, so I said "You are right, I wouldn't retire." He smiled, turned around and walked away.

I wonder still about this event in my life. Who was he? Was it a coincidence that he asked me the very question I was pondering how I would answer if asked? I guess I will never know...

The Edward

A day in Vegas

I was in Las Vegas yesterday. I was walking around comtemplating my life, as I always do while in Vegas, when I stumbled upon a thought. I have this nifty new job and all, but something seems to be missing. So I thought about it while walking around. I had just entered Casino Royale when I said to myself, "Should I stay or should I go? If I stay it could be trouble, but if I go it would be double." which left me no closer to a decision. I need a justification for my decision, whatever it might be. Then I saw a sign, "Change"!

-Edward

The Man Who Would Be King!

I was listening to my previously mentioned Joy of Science CD set when I stumbled upon a curious idea. The speaker was talking about some science dude from the good old US of A, though of course this dude's name actually eludes me. The speaker commented that though this guy did a something great for science, he had given himself the title of Lord (US citizens are title free, normally). Everyone at that time made fun of him, even the speaker on the CD set poked fun at this guy for giving himself the title of Lord. I didn't quite understand.

What is a Lord? Who gives out these titles? Why can one not start calling oneself Lord SomethingOrOther? Is it in the blood? Are Lords a different species than human? How would you spot a Lord in public? If you exhumed a hundred random bodies and included a Lord or two's bodies in the mix, could someone find the Lord? If not, then what is a Lord but an imaginary title, something that only exists in ones mind.

If I started calling myself Lord, what would be wrong with that? Do I need someone else to tell me that I can call myself Lord? Who would that person be? Why do I need that person to tell me that I can use the title Lord? What if that person told me in private that I can call myself Lord, but no one else was around to hear it, could I still use the title, or would people call me out?

How can someone give out titles to other people? It assumes that the title giver is giving out a title that is less than theirs, or else anyone could just hand out one of these nifty titles. So there is a top dog, and this top dog can say "You people, you are now bigger dogs than before, and I will let everyone know this, but I am still the top dog."

I really do not understand where these titles come from - it really seems so unreal. I guess I use a title, I have The in front of my name. Though, this wasn't something I thought of myself, someone else gave it to me. This person giving me the title of The is just as valid as someone giving someone else the title of Lord. Why not go out and Lord someone today!

The Edward

PS I actually have the title of Pope as well. I heard someone on Art Bell's show one night many years ago. He had his own church, and he clearly stated that everyone listen right then was now officially a Pope in his church! So, with the title of Pope, which seems to be a pretty high and mighty title, I hereby give all of my readers the title of Lord. Enjoy! And tell me how your friends and acquaintances treat you now that you call yourself Lord.

The Clothes

I saw something interesting the other day. It does seem that I see something interesting every day, but I guess how this blog came about. I saw two women talking in an office setting. One of them was obviously the boss of the other. How could I tell? Genius! Okay, I could tell not only by the body language, but by how they were dressed. I realized that other people could also tell she was an important person by the way she dressed. I then extended that to realize that the clothes really do make the person.

Everyone dresses their role. Would you ever expect to see a CEO wearing ripped up shorts and a t-shirt that says "Shit happens" on it? Even in the privacy of his/her own home? Never. And why is that? Because they have to dress the way they do or else people would know that they are important.

If people wore no clothes, no jewelry, no nothing, how would people know who is important? Body language, you say. How about in an email or in a blog where one never sees the other person? The words they use, the topics they discuss, etc, would give you an idea of who they are.

But what does this all mean? Aren't people just free entities, able to explore this rich world of ours, to live their lives, to be equal to all other humans? No, actually. People need to label and classify the group and level of themselves and others. Even the words I chose to use like "is important" were chosen to show the bias, because who can be more important than anyone else? It is all a belief, all created by each person, as to how important they really are, and how important they want others to see them as.

You can fool the masses. You can dress like a CEO - just walk into the store and by the clothes. You can learn to hold yourself like one as well. You can talk about the things that they talk about. What do you think this would do? As they say in Science: try it!

Why did I pick a topic that is so obvious? People know that the clothes make the man. I know I have heard it all of my life. But, I think it is all an act. If you start acting like someone else, or a different station in life, you will become that person/station. CEOs and such do not dress the way they do because they want to, they do it because it is an agreed upon way to mark themselves so that others might approach them with the correct attitude. How embarrassing would it be to start working at a new company, be less than friendly to some wandering stranger in the hallway, only to later find out that it was the founder/owner of that company?

So, it works both way. One can move up the ranks of society, and in doing so one must update ones wardrobe. Or one can dress as the upper ranks and one will nature rise with the force of the rest of humanity pushing them upward.

It is hard to dress in a manner that one believes is not right for them. If you change your clothes, you will change who are you. Try it.

The Edward