Quantum Space?

What's all this hoo-ha that I've been hearing these days?  Quantum this and quantum that.  Seems that the young whippersnappers have gotten together with the old geezers and decided to start a ruckus.  Making everything quantum on us while our backs were turned.  Outrageous, I tells ya!

I remember the days of my misspent youth, everything was continuous back then.  Then one day, some wiseguy decides that energy is discrete, then suddenly every starts talking about quantum theory, with quantum energy.  I should have known then where this would lead, but I was young and foolish.  Nipped it in the bud, I should've!

This will lead to the downfall of the human race, I'm sure of it.  Mark my words, the aliens that discover the ashes of this once proud race will point to quantum theory and laugh, and laugh, and laugh.  Or whatever those methane beathers do that is the equivalent of mocking anothers hubris.

See, after quantum energy, these slick willies calling themselves Scientist decided that maybe everything is quantum!  Maybe time happens in discrete units - there would be a smallest time unit, for which there is no smaller.  Then the granddaddy of problems:  quantum space!  Space, with a smallest possible unit!  Quantum of space.  Can you imagine that?  Scientist actually proposed such an idea!...

What does this mean for us?  It means that everything that we know is wrong!  The shortest distance between two points can no longer be a straight line, if space really exists with a discrete unit.  How do they explain a^2 + b^2 = c^2?  There can be no non-rational distance with a quantum of space, so therefore going from point a to b is the same as moving along one axis of a, then the second axis, etc, until one reaches b.  Short cutting a diagonal has no meaning!  I tell you, if a is at 0,0, and b at 1,1, the outrageous claim is that the distance is now 2, instead of the sqrt(2).  One over then one up.  Blasphemous I tell you!

And all of this is based on Quantum Theory. A theory that at its core contains a divide by zero. Why as any nimrod knows, one can prove anything with a divivde by zero! Renormalization, my ass! Pure balderdash! Poppycock!

Who is watching over these Scientist?  I thought it was your turn?

The Edward