Technical Virgin
What defines a virgin? What defines cheating? If you are not a virgin and want to determine if what you are about to do would be cheating, how about this definition: if you were a virgin, and you did this act, would you still call yourself a virgin? Doesn't the word virgin imply a sexual virgin? (in this case vs in a long ago blog) If so, then anything that would change your state from virgin to non-virgin would be a sexual act, but is the converse true? So, I've been thinking, what is a virgin and what would be cheating?
At some point in your life, you are/were a virgin. When did that status change? Assume a virgin. After which of these would this person no longer be a virgin: After masturbating? Masturbating while someone else is in the room? Someone holding this person while masturbating? Both people masturbating themselves? Masturbating each other? A finger or two inside?
Still there? Now, focus explicitly on women (since society recognizes women's virginity more than men's): Using a dildo? Someone holding the dildo but not touch this woman? Someone holding her while she used a dildo? Wearing the dildo on ones body while the woman was using it? Say the dildo was hollowed out, so one slips a finger in the dildo while she is using it? How about a man touching the end of the dildo with his divine rod? Putting his johnson inside of the hollowed-out dildo while she is using it? Making the dildo thinner, so that the man could feel the inside of the woman while she was using it? Making the dildo so thin, it is actual a condom?
If a woman did which of these things would you scoff if she said she was still a virgin? What about two women or two men? Starting from the same point, where can they say "Nope, not a virgin."? I've heard people say "Penetration, that is where virginity ends. For the guy, once he goes it, and for the women, once a guy is inside." So, what about lesbians who do not penetrate? Is there something to these L.U.G.s? (Lesbians Until Graduation)
I've also heard: sex is an act defined by the ability to procreate. Does that mean that lifetime gays will always be virgins? They also said that when getting married in the Catholic Church, the wedding isn't consummated until sex happens without a condom. This implies none of the above list makes one a non-virgin!
Then there is oral and anal sex, which some claim isn't really sex either. (Bill Clinton for the first, and a group called Technical Virgins for the second.)
So, it would seem that there are possibly a lot of things one could do and still claim to be a virgin. And, if these acts do not make one a non-virgin, by my definition, they are not sex. It seems that as long as one uses a condom, one may claim virginity!
The Edward
PS I think I will explore more on cheating in the next blog (or previous in blog-listed order). But it is tied to this one...
2 comments:
In the olden god-fearing days, V was defined as not having been penetrated. They basically kept the women separated and sheltered and chastity-belted. Once she was penetrated by a man's thang, she was deemed a fallen woman, scorned, thrown from the family, and went down many social levels to become a pariah.
Then it was the "golden age", the early 1900's, where rules relaxed as far as spending chaperoned time in the opposite sexes company, but still, if an older unmarried or married woman was found out to be having sex with a man she was not married to, she was deemed a fallen woman, scorned, loss of privilege and social levels.If the woman was a young one and virginal (meaning, had not spent the "quality time" needed with a man) and found having sex... the shit hit the fan pretty hard for both the man and woman - shotgun marriage and learning they really didn't like each other after all and now saddled with unpleasant screaming offspring.
Later in the 1900's, like the late 50's-70's, things started to become ambiguous what with the rebels, rock'n'roll, bra burning, drugs, and flower power. I think they defined a V as someone who has never done something before. So you could be several or many Vs at the same time - LSD V, alcohol V, cocaine V, same sex V, etc.
Then the 80's with the "who cares, have sex with anyone coz it doesn't matter and it's fun and being the only one who hasn't had sex is just WRONG" times.
Then the 90's with AIDS, so things are now back to everything but penetration which if engaged in,should be with plastic labcoats on, several layers of latex on both parties parts, jumping up to shower to scrub down with bleach as soon as finished, and all the other freakin' preventatives man needs because of rampant serious consequences for having unprotected sex.
So being a V in my book is that you haven't done something and when you do it (what ever it is) for the first time, you are no longer considered a V in that activity.
---SAM
Interesting history on the word/concept. Thanks! I had also heard that the concept of sexual virginity didn't exist in ancient Egypt - how weird would that be...
You raise an interesting point, the concept of virgin expands to fill the gaps in the language. I've stated before the virgin needs to be a modifier rather than a word, since it seems that is an interesting concept to our society. But, using the word virgin has too much of a sexual connotation, so people snicker when it is used (virgin daiquiri, first time flying = airplane virgin, etc). Sounds like you would agree with this virgin-as-a-modifier concept. Rather than it being an on/off switch for all of sex, break sex down to say one is a virgin to a specific sex act. I was painting with too large of strokes before. Thank you.
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