To Your Health!

I'm a health nut. As I see it, if you do not have your health, you don't have anything. I care about my health and the health of others, and so I'll pass the savings on to you.

Chocolate. 10 years ago, I remember reading that one chocolate bar had as much fat as a few pieces of bacon. Being a doubter, and by good the fortune of having plenty of both in the frig, I looked at the packaging. Alas, it was true! But luck was on my side yet again, because it really doesn't matter how much fat is in something! If eating fat made you fat, where does fat come from? We eat vegetarians (or more correctly herbivores), and yet they have fat in their bodies... Grass must be very fatty indeed. But I digress. Chocolate has major health benefits! Antioxidants! (so be sure to eat some before you go to one of those Oxygen Bars at the Mall) Well, many other benefits as well, so no need to rehash them here - use the web, Luke.

Orgasms. Lots of information online about this, including the latest research claiming at least one orgasm a day has many, many health benefits to both sexes. The didn't distinguish how one achieves these orgasms, either by self, partner, group, flock of geese, etc. The only important point is that doing this greatly reduces heart disease and increases mental health, among its many other benefits.

Cold. Reducing the average room temperature by a few degrees doubles the lifespan of rats. Does this have the same affect on humans? I aim to find out by living in a comfortably cool house of 65 degrees. That is how much I care.

Well, there are 3 major things you can do to improve your health! And I know many more too, so this just might be the beginning. Some people, I believe of Puritan descent, believe that true happiness only comes from punishment and pain. So, they restrict themselves from things that they enjoy, even though enjoyment is a great stress reducer. The abuse their bodies, and not in the positive wholesome masturbation-type way, but by running many miles, swimming many laps, biking, rowing, flogging, dripping water on their foreheads, slowly destroying their bodies... sorry, I had to stop, it was becoming too painful to think about, and I believe in avoiding all pain. As the saying goes, "No pain, no pain."

I hope you will follow my tips to a healthy, happy life. Indulge in these things to excess! And anything else that feels good. If we did evolve, we would have evolved to get positive sensations from things that help us survive, so if it feels good, do it! If we were created, why would a creator surround us with pleasurable things unless it is for us to experience them! (unless he or she or it is a cruel god that likes to wave tasty donuts in the faces of very hungry people. if I believed in a god, I would believe in a loving, caring creator, someone who would only want the best for his or her or its children. us.) As I always say: there is no way to lose by being healthy.

Excuse me for a minute, I need to go take care of my health.

-Edward

PS Avoid doctors. They are not in the business of keeping you healthy, but treating the sick and getting people hooked on drugs. No doctor has ever healed anyone. The human body heals itself. If you break a bone, a doctor would set it in place, but your body then does all of the work. You did build your entire body from a single cell, right?