So far behind
I think about this blog every day. Throughout the day, I think "Wow, this would make an interesting blog entry! Now, how can I word it for maximum effect! And get the idea across that I am trying to get across with the least number of words and the clearest writing and not repeating and not using run-ons and get the idea across, and stuff!" It is usually at this last part that I stumble, and therefore do not end up writing anything. Which was the reason I created this blog in the first place, to convert the masses to my way of thinking! No, actually, to build up my ability to effectively convey a message to the masses so that I can influence their thinking in order to convert every to my way of thinking! Wait, how did I end up there again...
Okay, I wanted to work on my comedy skills, so that I could be a stand up comedian! Or write for such crack shows like Saturday Night Live or MadTV! And I wanted to start my own philosophy, one that was based on my world view, which I stole from many other people. And cash in writing books on this One World View, books that will get me lots of chicks and stuff. And stuff...
But then something wonderful happens - I spend so much time thinking about the right words that I never actually write any of them down. I spend all day obsessing over it, and never quite getting it right. Sure, I think of what I believe to be a few funny phrases to toss into the blog, but being able to put them all together in not only a coherent way, but also an interesting yet entertaining way. I want people who read them to find it worth their time. As well as find it funny to my future self, since I tend to reread my blog in the future rather than in the past.
Then, the Behind part kicks in. I get so far behind that I do not want to think about it again, so I avoid it. Same for most things in life - once I am behind, I want to walk away. Like trying to read a book for a book report. The closer to the date that it is due and I still hadn't read page one, the more and more annoying it became, because there really was no way to catch up, so I would just not do it. Just let it eat at me from the inside, like a giant... big something that eats things from the inside out.
But here I am again, writing in my blog, sharing my thoughts. Though this blog entry caught me by surprise, because it really wasn't a topic I was planning on writing on. Sure, I could say I was going to write about pussy, since I hadn't in a while, but I wasn't. Something about social contracts and the rich - kind of boring actually. Though I did think of an exciting one yesterday, but can not recall it right now.
I plan to keep it up going forward. I hope to see you here!
The Edward
3 comments:
Just do what I do- start with an idea and a good opening sentence and run from there.
It may not be great writing, but it gets the job done.
I get pissy when I'm behind with things. Thank goodness I don't think getting behind with my blog. It's just there when I have the time. Sometimes I have more and I can multiple post and ramble on (I am SO good at that)and right now I have less then zero (so I'm short sweet and boring). Kind of like real life...
A few thoughts. First, nothing comes 0out perfect the fiurst time. I am trying to publish this version as the way I wrote it the first time and will add the edits after, to illustratet. Not even spelling errors. Just flow, baby. Learning to tell yuour nner editor to STFUY while you ae in flow mode is a constant struggle for most (if not all) writters.
And yea, the behind pasrt can fuck you up also. I'm "behind" on posting my vacation pics from mamoth and Tahoe, from what? tw months ago. Argh. But I still want to do it, and yes, it does gnaw a bit.
I suggest you take a writing class at an extension college (USSC, or Berkeley, etc). Teh exercizses will help, and the feedback from the teachers and student will help even more.
Second draft:
A few thoughts. Nothing comes out perfect the first time. One of THE keys to writing is to shut off your internal editor while you are in the flow of writing your first draft. This is something most writers struggle with constantly, so don't beat yourself up about it, it's common.
Second, being "behind" can create stress, and sometimes that stress can be good (pressure to continue). But it can also beat you down sometimes, you just gotta balance the pressure.
Last, take a writing class. You'll get exposed to other people's writing and feedback, which thickens the skin up a bit. And you'll also be exposed to some exercises that can help with the self-editing, sentence craft, and help find YOUR style.
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