You don't want that!
I remember back to my college days, we would sometimes sit around and ask questions. You know, talk. I think they all found it boring without a drink in hand, but I thought it was a fascinating look into the minds of humans. Some of the questions and answers I will share with you in hopes that it will illuminate my point.
1) If you could go back in time, when, where, and why? An answer that few of the guys gave was: go back to when Winona Ryder wasn't famous and fuck her. I think that started a chain of guys naming other women that they would also want to do this to.
2) If you could have one supper power, what would you have and why? Common answers were invisibility or mind control. Again, so that they could meet up with some current celebrity and fuck her.
After just these two, I think we can see a theme, but is it the theme you think you are thinking of?
I believe I only ever met one person who said "I would want the power to make certain women fall in love with me." See, in the previous two answers, there was no talk of what the other person wanted. Isn't a definition of rape having sex with someone who doesn't want to? No one else talked about consent. They didn't want the other person to fall in love with them, have feelings, etc, they just wanted sex with that person. Isn't that the same thing as rape? They wanted to have sex with that person's body, not with that person, so she really didn't factor into it.
It looks like I am on the side of the guy who wanted women to fall in love with him, right? Wrong, and I will explain with another example. In answer to questions #1, some people also said "Go back in time and buy lots of stock XXX". What are they really saying? The money that they make off of this purchase would have been someone else's, right? Isn't this stealing? Going back in time and stealing from people who made money when you didn't? So that falling in love guy still wanted her to be someone else - like if he slipped her a drug that made her go wild for him, wouldn't that be the same thing, and wouldn't that also be rape? Taking something that someone else has but isn't giving it to you right now?
The common thread over all of these things is that people really do not want what they thing they want. If one thinks of the consequences and implications, it isn't what they believe it to be. One can not change one thing and keep the rest. If you want a woman (or man) sexually, you really want to rape them. If you want to have made a lot of money from someone but didn't, you really want to steal their money.
This is why I do not want things or people.
The Edward
5 comments:
Edward, rape isn't about sex, at all. So the answer to your question of, isn't it the same, the answer is no.
Interesting idea. I have heard that said before, though I do not have any experience with which I can use to directly disagree - I can only logic it out.
I am not quite sure why it is a power thing rather than a sex thing. Wouldn't there be other ways to show power? Isn't lust the driving force as to why sex is chosen as the weapon? They could just as easily beat the person with fists and clubs, which would show power. Are attractive people raped more than unattractive people?
Doing a search online I find a lot of people saying it isn't about sex, but I couldn't find any reasons given for that conclusion. Do you know of any? I'm curious about this.
As to the blog post, it seems to me to tie into the same thing. If someone lusts after something or someone, they want that thing or person. If there is no want of that person to want them back, isn't that a want to rape? Wouldn't it be a power thing? To change a person against their will? To say "I want that person" is to imply a show of power over that person? The desired person becomes not a person but a trophy, a conquest?
Your post seems to assume that even in the fantasy, the woman would not consent, therefore, it's rape. I don't think most people think of it that way. It's more along the lines of "It would be cool if that happened", not "I wish I could force myself on her."
Also, the logical extension of your premise would be that any fantasy is theft- you seem to be saying that the only way I could get something would be by denying it to someone else.
The roots of my (and, I'm guessing, most people's) fantasies is in imagining something better happening in my life. But not at the expense of others.
The fantasy itself is not the same as rape or theft. But if one went through the trouble to realize the fantasy, how would it be done? My issue with fantasies that involve gain of something that belongs to someone else is that it requires taking that from someone else at some point. Just as if someone has a fantasy of killing someone, what they really want is that person out of their life (and probably a few other things), but they express it as taking that person's life. I am suggesting that the same is true for wealth and pussy. If people thought through their fantasies, at some point, they want to gain from others - that is the important part of the fantasy.
I thought about it a bit more last night and read more online. When I talk of rape, I do not mean the violence often associated with it. Rape is the sexual act. Any violence is assault. That is why statutory rape is the crime of rape - minors can not consent. I remember in college, some frat boys had a girl in their house and tried to have sex with her, but couldn't get it up - they were charge with a sexual crime, not a violent crime. Oh how I hate that term, but it shows my point: Sexual Predators - not Power Predators.
If someone were to realize their dream of fucking someone, how might they do it? Say they give that person a drug that makes her (I need to pick a pronoun just to make the sentence make sense, rather than imply male/female only) want to have sex with everyone. If she has sex with the giver of the drug, he is raping her, even if there is no violence. Would we all agree on that? On a side not, what about anyone else who fucks her before the drug wears off - is that rape? I believe legally they are all rape.
I read someone online elsewhere asking the question that I've always wondered "Isn't all crime a show of power?"
Thought I have strayed from my point into another blog I was working on. My point for this one was that the realization of a fantasy often includes taking something, which probably isn't what you really want. Maybe another type of fantasy is in order? "I will improve myself such that I will get X in my future." with X being defined as something given to you because of your achievements.
Edward you are too logical. I think most people don't consider the zero sum game aspect when fantasizing about sex or wealth. I mean, it's a fantasy, not a complete functioning simulation of the world. Have you ever heard of the concept of "willing suspension of disbelief"?
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